Lead
After two children clash, parents tend to reach for the same words: "Say sorry."
The child says it, reluctantly. The moment passes. But how much did the child actually grasp — what happened to the other child, why the act was wrong, how the other person experienced it? Does requiring "sorry" build empathy? Or does the word drift off as ritual, unanchored to anything felt?
This article draws on empirical research to map how empathy develops, and to think through what "sorry" actually means at different ages. The short version: empathy moves sharply in the second year of life, but the social understanding that "sorry" requires tends to come somewhat later — and the two should not be conflated.